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It's the dog days of summer (in the northern
hemisphere) when the temperature goes up (and has been up for a while) and tempers can flare.
Learning to manage anger is an emotional intelligence competency and a process of personal awareness and growth.
1. Understand the physiological process and how it effects you.
It's called affective neuroscience, and you'll
find it fascinating. Check it out! Take The EQ
Foundation Course ( http://www.susandunn.cc/courses.htm ) and
get the basics so you understand what's going on and how it works within you.
2. Learn your hot buttons and what triggers your temper.
For each of us it's different.
3. Learn what causes stress in your life and
eliminate what you can.
Work with your coach to remove obstacles, reframe problems, meet goals and lessen the frustration in your life.
4. If it's beyond your control, let go and let
God.
5. Develop some healthy outlets for your anger
such as whacking weeds or hitting a tennis ball.
6. Learn how your diet affects your disposition.
We are what we eat. Caffeine, and high fat/high
cholesterol food increase irritability. Remember the 3 white poisons - sugar, flour and cocaine.
7. It can be as simple as getting enough rest and sleep.
Over-the-counter medications can also affect your mood and ability to handle your emotions.
8. Learn to cool down, just as you do after
exercising.
Stop, count to 10, take deep breaths, think about something distracting. Sunsets and rivers work for some folks, but for you it might be thinking back over an exciting ballgame while you sit in the traffic jam. Learn to self-soothe so you can "regain your senses" and think clearly. Take a time-out if need be and come back to the issue later on.
9. Do things that foster your self-esteem.
When you feel good about yourself, anger is more manageable, and you earn your self-esteem!
10. Get emotional intelligence coaching.
You must get coaching in addition to reading and study, because EQ involves social and emotional skills that must be practiced with expert guidance.
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